Kiss My Aster

Amanda Thomsen

You might be a micromanager if:

1.    You have an adult, knowledgeable crew that isn’t allowed to make decisions because that’s YOUR job, isn’t that why you’re the boss?

2.    Your underlings scatter when you approach and you think they may be communicating with each other using bird calls and ciphered notes left in the bathroom.

3.    You think everyone isn’t capable of doing what you do (this is SUCH a dangerous headspace to be in; if you’re here, just book a trip to Cancun right now. Before you finish this column. Just go … NOW).

4.    Your turnover is high and it’s the most talented people that leave. As an employee, why stick around and be told what to do when you’re totally capable? If you’ve hired awesome people, why micromanage? You’re actually second guessing* yourself here.

5.    You think The Big Picture is a band from the ’80s.

6.    You hover like a drone. It’s so bad you should be registered with the FAA.

7.    You’re not focused on results because you’re too dang busy nitpicking. You’d tell your employees what they should have for lunch if you could. Or perhaps you already have …

8.    Does the word “delegate” make you flinch?

9.    You’d rather choke yourself with the hose than ask your employees for their opinions.

10.    Have you ever redone an employee’s work?

Recognize yourself? I’ve been micromanaged and it was the opposite of fun, rewarding employment. The whole team felt zapped, like mindless labor.

So, YOU SHOULD STOP THAT RIGHT NOW. Here’s how:

1.    The beauty of letting your team contribute is huge. Everyone learns, everyone is invested; it may not turn out 1,000% like you wanted, but it might turn out better. Also, the chances of it turning out like you’d hoped were slim-to-none to begin with, and if you say otherwise, I’m guessing your pants are on fire right now.

2.    If it all goes down the tubes, you have someone to blame. It’s a dirty truth—from here you can drop the axe or train them up.

3.    Limit yourself to a normal, legal, work day. Yup, eight hours a day with lunches and breaks. It makes you twitch just reading it, right?

4.    Practice delegating. Tell your employees you’re trying to change, approach it with humor. What’s the worst that can happen?

5.    Do you like increased productivity? It’s what teams do. A fractured workforce that’s afraid of getting the newspaper (like a bad puppy) for not doing something YOUR WAY isn’t the most productive.

6.    Your mantra, say it in the mirror 10 times every time you see yourself in the mirror: “Intelligent, empathetic oversight.”

7.    When you rely on your employees to do their jobs instead of doing it for them, or making their jobs to be following strict orders from you instead of what they really SHOULD be doing, some will soar and some will sink.

8.    Time to do a trust fall with your employees. I double-dog dare you.

9.    Can someone be loyal to a micromanager? How are you going to get that loyalty? Every time a micromanagement blip is gonna come out of your mouth, swap it for something ENCOURAGING**.

10.    Ultimately, what’s going to motivate your team to get results? BIG PICTURE results? GP

*Also, don’t second guess. Or just don’t do it out loud.

** Also helpful in child-rearing

Amanda Thomsen is now a regular columnist in Green Profit magazine. You can find her funky, punky blog planted at KissMyAster.co and you can follow her on Facebook and Twitter @KissMyAster.